societal convergence

day 341

Model is Ivy.

There is a new art installation around my campus, so I utilized it for my own artistic purposes. We only had time at night to shoot it, so it was fun experimenting again with night photography.

it's too cold outside for angels to fly

day 340

First of all, I have never smoked and never will. It's pretty unhealthy and I don't encourage people to do it (not judging anyone who does). Technology creates these great things called props and photoshop so that people like me can get cool smoking pictures (because I do love the feel of those types of photographs) without any actual smoking.

Aaaanyways, for this photo I wanted to create a character bustling through a busy street on a cold winter's day, and I also wanted to give an air of mystery around her. Hence the smoke and downward gaze and blurryness (even though that one actually wasn't intentional ... ssh!). My friend snagged me a fake cigarette from the theater department because there have been a lot of ten minute student plays (which have been unbelievably awesome!) and they had some extra props. And we all know how I love crazy, weird props.

In just a few minutes I'm heading out to an art exhibition to see some senior projects, and then later tonight there are more student directed plays. It's just been a really artsy-fartsy day and those are my favorite kind of days.

before and after here!

consequences of vowels

day 339

Look who finally decided to take pictures for the 365 project again. Seriously I don't know what's wrong with me. I absolutely love the photo-taking process but it takes everything in me to initiate it. I guess the hardest part of something really is starting it.

if I would just wash these stars they would sparkle

day 336

for some reason this looks really gross on my blog, so you should look at it here.

I have to tip my hat in my friend Kameron's direction, because I thought about her editing style while I edited this. I'm making a ton of stars for a photo series, so I decided to utilize one today.

stop whispering

day 335

I know this picture isn't really creative, but I played around with it in photoshop and I wanted a new facebook profile picture, hehe. My date Amy and I went to a fancy Art Christmas party and it was so much fun! You guys would have been proud at how much I was talking. It was seriously a blast eating and hanging out with people and then dancing. You would think that art people would be boring dancers but man, they can get crazy! I can't wait to be an art major! (I'm currently an English major, but I'm going to double major ... I just have to fill out the paperwork!) I seriously love being able to go to a school where everyone is passionate about what they're studying and I love being surrounded by passionate people. Plus the Christmas season always puts me in a good mood. (And this note is for my parents: at the party they played a song from that one Christmas orchestra that you guys always play and it instantly took me back to Christmas in Alaska. I can't wait to come back home in just two weeks!)

sailboats wished that they were stars

day 334

I'm too tired to really write a story to go along with this photo, but rest assured there is a beautiful one lurking in the darkness.

And since I'm so tired, I'm simply going to number what happened today.

1. I didn't realize until dinner that it was Friday and it made me really happy.
2. I successfully presented my introvert/extrovert psychology project.
3. We watched Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer and it made me very excited for Christmas.

I hope you guys have a fantastic weekend!

pointing myself home

day 333



The highlight of my day was getting my compass plate back from the kiln. It has really deep meaning for me and I really love it a lot. Really everything about the ocean has so much symbolism with my own life.



I feel like sometimes I'm the ocean. I don't know if that's prideful to say or not ... but the ocean is so big and huge and so many people only want to sail on the surface. Sometimes I'm calm, sometimes I get angry, but I feel like very few people have been willing to plunge into who I really am. I know I'm beautiful and am filled to the brim with things waiting to be discovered, but sometimes I need help with that. More often than not people are fine with just staying on my surface and to be quite honest, my surface is boring. My surface is shy. My surface doesn't understand very much. My surface is quiet and curious and naive and gullible and too trusting. My surface is too judgmental of myself and it doesn't think I'm good enough. But underneath my surface, the part that only a few people get to see (and parts that no one has seen yet), I think is overflowing with greatness. Everyone has greatness and for once I actually want to talk about my own. My depths are bursting with color and ideas and it's loud and sometimes my thoughts are so loud it literally hurts to speak. My depths are infinitely curious and filled with wonder from the world. My depths whisper aspirations that seem impossible but they drive me. My depths have deep pain and sadness brought on by storms and shipwrecks and sirens that I thought would stay in my life forever. I've learned all too soon that nothing lasts though (or at least, very few things), so I don't want to open my depths to everyone. It's hard for me to express things sometimes. I constantly have to redirect myself because I'm always failing, whether that be actually failing or just being too hard on myself.

So to bring this post full circle, my compass plate reminds me to share the depths of who I am, and it also reminds me that it's okay to fail as long as I continue to point myself home.

lay me down

day 332

before and after on my facebook page!

Big thanks to Ben for moving my camera around for the expansion when I couldn't really move from my spot on the wall, haha. We ran into each other today so he came with me when I took this photo. I was super glad he came along because he is a great human being as well as an incredibly talented photographer. And while talking to him, it made me realize just how relational photography is. I think I will have failed as a human being if I didn't meet as many people as possible, and photography is such a beautiful way to do that. Even if I was horrible at taking photos, I think I would still be happy if I could be with other people who loved what I loved. Because what makes me happiest is not coming up with ideas or taking photos or editing or posting them to share with others (though those do make me happy); what makes me happiest is being with people, and people who share the same passions as me (and even people who appreciate my passions). There's just something special about having something that is such a part of you also be such a part of someone else, and being able to connect in that way.

but she came and left

day 331

Even though I like this photo, I wish I could create some photos with an actual concept. I have tons of ideas sketched out in my sketchbook, but for some reason (one that I do not know), I never actually do them. I feel like I've reached that stage in photography where I've learned a lot of the editing and shooting process and mostly have that down (I say this lightly because there's always room for improvement), and the 365 is good for figuring those things out. But now I need to learn how to go through the process of coming up with a concept, preparing for it, and then shooting it successfully. It seems to me that the 365 (at least, if you actually take one photo each day) isn't quite the best for something like that. I could be wrong though. I could just be extremely lazy or scared to actually go out and do the more crazy ideas in my head. I don't know, I'm just sort of rambling on. Regardless, tomorrow is my busy day so I may not get a killer concept out the door just quite yet. But I hope you guys have a great day!

now I'm closer to the sun

day 329

After doing homework (aka procrastinating by looking through old old facebook photos ... like year 2008 photos. Let me just say, there are some treasures in there, haha!), I chased down the sunset. My friend Bekah brought me back a dress from her home that her Aunt didn't want, and of course I had to take it out for a run. I love that my friends cater to my crazy photoshoot props and wardrobe. Currently my room is filled with a stolen traffic cone, a wig, a giant crayon, fancy goblets, random butterflies and other crazy stuff. What's another dress to add to the collection?

southbound train

day 324

Well I just got back from standing outside watching firefighters run into our dorm with flames stretching across the sky.

Okay just kidding, the firefighters didn't even run and we were all standing out in the rain because of burnt popcorn, but having the fire alarms go off at 11:40 at night is not good for my productivity. But it was an exciting moment in my college career and therefore deemed worthy of blogging about.

But on to other matters! I am super proud of this photo. A before and after is up on my photography page, and this photo definitely looks a LOT differently than the original photo, and I am really proud of it. Tabatha is always such a willing (and gorgeous) model and I'm so glad to have her as my friend!

engineers

day 323

Here's something a bit different for today's 365 photo! I was planning on doing just a simple portrait of my face, but it ended up being slightly different and I really like it.

Today was the first day I thought, "Why the heck did I move to Oregon?" I now realize why some people don't like Oregon. It was so rainy and windy I thought I was going to be blown away. Okay, I'm definitely exaggerating, but I am certainly pining for at least no rain in the clouds. I talked to my dad on the phone last night and he said that I have to have my Christmas list together by Thanksgiving, and after today, I am definitely going to be putting some boots on that list. I previously had no shoes that were waterproof, but thankfully the shoes that I bought a few weeks ago did the trick on this dreary day. So many puddles!



Other than that, I did really well on my two tests today. I already got the grade back for one (it was a 97% on my Bible test yay!) and am waiting for the other one, and I'm glad I can cross those things off my list of things I need to do before Thanksgiving!

somewhere under the clouds a sun still shines

day 322

This is my first (successful) RAW photo and let me just say, why the heck did I not shoot RAW earlier? Seriously, if you were like me and totally oblivious to all things fantastical, then read this article that Seth sent me. It will blow your mind.

Shot this in the rain, in the dark. I got all wet and my camera battery died and I was frustrated that I hadn't shot a compelling concept and didn't even have a very good pose, but after working on it for a long time, I actually really enjoy this photo. And I'm still not done with this location yet! I made a new set for this location, and as said in the description: this isn't a series, just a collection of photos taken at the abandoned house at the end of the street. I want to show the versatility of one location that would have gone otherwise unnoticed had I not roamed around aimlessly. It was that one chance encounter with the old country road that lead to all of these photos. You can check out the set here, as I will constantly be adding to it because I'm going to milk this location for all it's worth.

p.s. Thank you all for your kind comments yesterday. I will hold them in my heart forever. :)

Hope you all have a fantastic day!

this is for those who think they've lost hope

day 321

This photo is for everyone who has encouraged me, left a comment, liked, favorited, whatever, on my photos. I really am my own worst critic. I know what I'm capable of and I beat myself up whenever anything is less than perfect. Sylvia Plath (aka my spirit animal) said that "the worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt" and I seem to have it in excess. It seems like every other day I think about quitting the 365 or I think about how incompetent I am, but the things that keeps me going are your encouraging words. Even a couple minutes before this photo was taken, I was so distraught in my own self doubt that I considered quitting. And literally (I kid you not), the moment I thought that, my friend Sarah posted on my facebook wall that my work keeps getting better and better. I started crying. And then I took this photo. It is for Sarah and everyone else who encourages me that keeps me going, and it's me with that stubborn urge to become good at something that keeps me going. So thank you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you. I don't think you'll ever know just how deeply your kind words affect me and how extremely grateful I am for them. Seriously, I could never ever thank you enough.

horizon line

day 320

If I didn't have to take a photo every day, this would be one of those photos that would never get put on the internet. I tried a brand new way of shooting, but I obviously did not succeed since this photo is less than perfect (aka really bad. I'm so embarrassed to post this but I have nothing else). I'm about ready for this project to be over because I'm tired of unsuccessful photos. But oh well. Such is life. Today's photo will be posted after I take it. ;)

Varðeldur

day 319

This photo was major experimentation as I accidentally slept past sunset and had no light outside. But tomorrow is another day.

we stretch across generations

day 318

view it here

What is beauty? Beauty is that which we see in nature. An old tree that has gazed upon generations. The forest around him was cut down and they were reduced to boards and shingles, but still they held beauty for they gazed upon generations. The people around them grew up and tall and touched the skies and flew past them. They saw the highest mountains and the deepest, darkest ocean trenches and still those desolate places held beauty for they gazed upon generations. The earth is beauty and beauty is the earth. We are all connected because of the universal handprint we bear and the beauty we possess and we stretch across generations.

I'm going to try to incorporate more writing into my photos, and in light of this post, my skills in writing and photography will both grow at the same time, even if I'm just writing a little bit each day.

When I was walking to the location for today's photo, I had a couple ideas, but today none of them seemed right. I ended up walking around, quickly running out of time before class, but then I looked up and saw an old tree with a crevice that looked just like an eye, so of course I had to take a picture of it.

codex

day 317

model is my obviously gorgeous friend Tabatha.

I wanted to shoot with the lovely rose bush before winter came, and I knew Tabatha would be perfect for it. She is a great model and always knows exactly what to do. Seriously, this girl is the bomb.

Also you can check out my photography page for alternate versions of this photo. I would love it if you 'liked' the page and stick around for updates!

home boundary

day 316

Today I explored around my town again, not really knowing what I was going to do for a photo but being glad I was finally feeling happy about photography again, and found this awesome abandoned building at the end of a string of cute old houses. It's so cool that all these locations are just a couple blocks away, and all it takes is walking around and looking for them.

we are all connected

day 315

What makes you uniquely you?

As I go through life, I've discovered how un-unique I am. There are thousands of people who wear the same clothes as me, participate in the same activities as me, believe the same doctrines as me, and ever ignorantly thinks that they are the only one to experience the same things as me. I don't really find that saddening though, for humans are relational figures and thus our un-uniqueness binds us to one another. I think uniqueness is a highly relative term (at least in this case), but what makes me (and any other human) unique is my relationship with others and their relationship with me. I place great worth on certain people, and that ability to give and receive worth is unique to every individual, with an infinite amount of combinations brought about through every person everyone comes in contact with. I can make a person seem to me more or less unique, and others can do the same in their view of me and the view of their relationship with me. We are all connected by this ability as well as our un-uniqueness, which in a sense makes us incredibly unique in that we are all the connecting element of the red string of destiny and without each one of us, the string would be broken.

-- my answer to a psychology question that we never turned in.

"An invisible red thread connects those who are destined to meet regardless of time, place or circumstance. The thread may tangle but it will never break." -- Chinese Proverb